


Just Close Your Eyes

by princessmermaid



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Book: New Moon, Cuddling & Snuggling, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Friendship/Love, Light Angst, My First AO3 Post, POV Bella Swan, Romance, Sleepy Cuddles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:01:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29123100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princessmermaid/pseuds/princessmermaid
Summary: Missing New Moon moment, set in Victoria time. Bella tries to convince Jacob to take a nap, and reflects on how much she missed him.
Relationships: Jacob Black/Bella Swan
Kudos: 14





	Just Close Your Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> I love all the sleepy Jacob/Bella moments so much, and I want more, so here we are. I also might add more missing moments to this...because there are simply too few <3

I knew Jacob felt guilty for “ditching me”, as he said. He told me it wouldn’t always be like this. But with the current... _situation_...the pack had to be on near constant alert. It wasn’t bad hanging out here all the time. It was actually starting to feel like home. It was nice to spend time at Emily’s, or here at the beach. Still, while I knew Jake wasn’t really ditching me, the reason for his absence sent a deep shudder pulsing through me every time I thought of it. And selfishly, as usual, I simply wanted him with me instead. He seemed to have gathered as much, and he promised me he could spend at least a few hours with me today. I felt guilty for making him feel guilty, but I just couldn’t refuse. I had been looking forward, and really, anxiously waiting for him all day.

A large pair of hands gently squeezed my shoulders from behind. I was startled for a brief moment, and then felt heat seeping through my shirt onto my shoulders and down my arms.

“Must you always _sneak up_ on me? You scared me again.” I turned around to see Jacob, feeling more at ease now than I had all day.

“You’re just an especially jumpy, little person, Bells. That’s on you.” he smiled and swung his arm around my shoulders, pulling me to his side with a squeeze.

“I guess that’s what hanging around giant, obnoxious monsters does to a person.” I countered, shoving him lightly. He smiled, but as I looked at him my face fell. He looked terrible. Well, no, not terrible. That was mean. And not really true. But he did look desperately tired. His warm eyes were rimmed with darkness. He looked weary, even worn. And a bit disheveled.

“Oh...Jake...you should get some rest or something. You don’t have to spend your time with me today.”

“What do you mean, Bella? I promised you. I’m fine. I’m sure I’ll have plenty of time to sleep after we finally take care of that nasty little leech…” He stopped himself. “Anyway, you’re not getting rid of me today. I’ve been waiting all day to annoy you.” he smiled mischievously. “So, what did you want to do?” I felt very guilty now, looking into those dark, exhausted eyes. I tried to hide my frown, but I imagine it came across as a pathetic half-smile.

“Let’s just go back to your place then, ok?”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I plopped down on the couch and Jake brought me a soda, which I happily sipped at. He joined me and looked at me as if to ask what I wanted to do again. Before he could actually ask, I spoke.

“And now...you are going to take a nap.” He rolled his eyes.

“Bella! I told you, I’m fine.”

“You look exhausted, Jake.” I tried to sound more matter of fact, and less concerned than I really was, though I couldn’t have been all that successful.

“Yeah, well I’ll be fine. Anyway, I can’t really sleep for very long lately, even if I wanted to. It’s kind of hard to.”

“What do you mean?” I asked looking up into his eyes, though they didn’t meet mine.

“I don’t know. It’s kind of hard to not be...alert all the time. I guess. Which is probably a good thing. But anyway, Bella, it’s not a big deal. I’m fine, really.”

It wasn’t a good thing _at all._ I hated that he felt compelled to do this, so much so that he couldn’t even sleep. He would deny it of course, but this had worn on him as much, if not more, than it was wearing on me. I wished achingly that I could help him. Even a little bit. I brought both my hands to his arm, tugging it lightly.

“Well, can’t you at least _try_ to sleep? Even for a little bit. A little sleep is better than nothing.” I leaned in closer to him. “Really Jake, when was the last time you actually slept? Or took a shower?” I asked, as I gingerly brushed some piece of leafy forest debris from his hair. Maybe that would help. Showers relaxed people sometimes, right?

“Maybe you should take a shower. You’ll feel better.” I said eagerly.

“You mean I’ll _smell_ better?” A sarcastic half-smirk pulled at his mouth.

“Well..., I think you could probably keep vampires, and humans at a distance at the moment.” I crossed my arms and looked at him teasingly. He didn’t really smell so bad. Not to me, at least. But, perhaps he would be more likely to oblige if he thought it was for my benefit.

“Right.” he said, his expression somewhere between a smirk and a grimace. “I guess I’ll take a shower then.” he continued, pulling himself up from the couch. “I don’t really want to... leave you alone, though..” he sounded uneasy, even awkward. What did he mean? Did he really think I would be in danger here, in his house, with him in another room? Or did he think he was being inconsiderate or something?

“Jake...don’t be ridiculous..” I looked at him in confusion.

“Okay. I’ll be fast. Don’t go anywhere.” he crouched down to face me and grabbed my arms gently.

“Of course not!.” I insisted. Where did he think I was going to go? “Now, go! Please!” I shoved him away from me with a playful push.

I wondered what Jake had meant when he said he didn’t want to leave me alone. I felt safer here than anywhere else. I was less scared for myself than I had been since I found out about Victoria. It wasn’t my safety that plagued my mind most now, but theirs. The whole pack. And Jacob. A horrible, dangerous job to do...all because of me…

My thoughts were interrupted by Jacob’s clamorous plopping down on the couch. He leaned back and swung his long legs over me so they crossed my lap and dangled off the edge. His hair was wet and had left little dark droplets all over his t-shirt, probably from him shaking it out wildly as he often did.

“I hope I’m not offending your delicate nostrils anymore.” he said, stretching his arm out behind his head with a yawn.

“Not at all!” I giggled a little. “Much better. Now that we’ve taken care of _that_ , you can just close your eyes.” He rolled them at me instead.

“You said we could do whatever I want!” I pleaded.

“And what you want to do is watch me snore?”

“ _Listen_ to you snore actually, Jake. I’ll turn the TV on or something if I get bored. Really.” He looked at me with that strained expression again.

“I’ll wake you if I have to leave or anything. Promise. It’s not like I could go anywhere anyway. I’m trapped under your enormous legs!” He smiled a little at this and looked up at the ceiling. “We can just talk! And if you doze off, you doze off! Okay?” I swirled my finger gently around the hand resting on his stomach.

“Okay.” He looked to me. “So what’s the topic of conversation now? We’ve already covered how bad I look and how bad I smell. Or did you want to want to say more about that?”

I burst into soft, but genuine laughter, warmed to hear the familiar smile in his tired voice. “Maybe how pretty your eyelashes are.” I looked at them as his eyes fluttered sleepily, so thick and dark. He shifted his head languorously, and mumbled something.

“You’re weird, Bella.” was all I could make out.

“You have some nerve saying that.” I said, softly poking his waist with my finger. I received no response, other than the heavy, even breathing that was now melting into a light snore.

That didn’t take long. I smiled and leaned my head back. I could feel the heat from Jacob’s legs hovering over me, radiating down gently like an air vent. His snoring deepened a bit. It made me smile again. I liked to hear it. It was better than silence right now. My eyes rested on him for a moment, watching his chest rise and fall steadily. It made me feel steady too.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My eyes popped open to a brief few seconds of confusion. I felt warm, except for my arms and shoulders. I readjusted and stretched them out in front of me. I didn’t remember falling asleep at all. Well, I guess you never really remember falling asleep exactly, but it still seemed strange. I didn’t remember dreaming anything. It couldn’t have been for very long. I looked over to see Jacob completely unchanged. I couldn’t help but stare. I was sure there would still be lingering darkness around his eyes when they opened, but he looked so much better right now, so...sweet. He did look innocent, as I had noticed before. And there it was again, that surge of protectiveness for _him_. But it was him who would be protecting me. Victoria was here because of me. The pack had to fight because of me. This strained and uneasy Jacob was a direct result of me. Everything came back to _me_. And I just wanted to make it stop.

His eyes fluttered a little. His eyelashes really were pretty. I sighed, and a squeezing pang of softness welled up in my chest. All at once, I felt horribly guilty, and horribly worried, and horribly _good_ to have him here with me. I thought of how just a very short time ago, I thought I wouldn’t be able to see him anymore. How he had told me just that. How sharply it had stung. How violently I missed him. And how I thought he had finally given up on me. _As he should._ That thought was like a reflex. Despite it, I knew that no matter how incredibly complicated the truth had turned out to be, I would rather face anything than _that_. I shut my eyes and felt that tears might just spill out of them. I breathed a frustrated sigh at myself. What a ridiculous mess I was.

My inward drama was interrupted by a shifting of weight as Jacob started to prop himself up. He swung his legs off from across me to sit up, and I found I missed the warmth I had forgotten they were providing me.

“Hey.” he said, his voice deep and groggy. “Ugh.” he groaned. “ I’m sorry, Bells, I-”

“I missed you so much!” I cut him off and wrapped my arms around him in that way I sometimes felt compelled to do. I thought perhaps I looked and sounded silly, but I couldn’t really help it. Jake seemed a bit surprised, but effortlessly returned my embrace. He patted my back gently.

“Wow. How long was I asleep?” he asked, his voice still thick with tiredness.

“Not nearly long enough! I wish you could have slept longer. I meant I missed you before that.” I said, resting my face against his chest. It had gotten cooler as the sun began to set, and the warmth felt nice against my cheek.

“I know Bells, I really am sorry. It won’t be like this forever, I promise. I’ll try to see you more, even if it’s just for a little while. And next time, I promise we’ll do something more fun than this.”

“Oh, I didn’t really mean that either. Please don’t feel sorry for that. I understand.” I did, of course. But I certainly didn’t like it. The uneasy thought kept me from moving.

“What did you mean, then?” He spoke softly.

“I just meant when, you know, I couldn’t talk to you _at all_.” I spoke softly now too. He stiffened, but didn’t release me.

“I’m sorry for that too, Bella. I’m really, really sorry for that. You don’t know how sorry I am for that. I-” he sounded pained again.

“I know!” I cut him off again. “I know that, and I understand that too. I just meant that I missed you.” I pressed myself closer to his chest. “And I can’t believe you thought something as simple as you being a werewolf would be enough to get rid of me.”

He laughed and rubbed his hand against my shoulder. “I guess you’re right.”

“I know you couldn’t really help it, and it wasn’t really your fault, and that you weren’t allowed to tell me. But if anything like that ever happens again, I trust that you’ll tell me, Jake. It doesn’t matter what it is. I don’t care.”

“Happens _again_? Bella, don’t even say that. How could something like this happen again? When I find out I’m also half mermaid?” he groaned.

“You know what I mean!” I said, and hoped he did. He leaned his head and pulled me closer in response. I still didn’t want to move away. I hoped I hadn’t made him feel too guilty again. I had been doing that a lot. I felt the welling up in my chest again. I told myself I would move, but I didn’t.

“I do wish you didn’t have to fight vampires, though.” I said dejectedly. “I wish I could do something. Please tell me you’ll be really careful, and you won’t do anything dangerous that isn’t absolutely necessary.”

“Bella, you really do have to have a little bit more confidence in us. It really is insulting. She’s fast, but so are we. She’s not indestructible.”

“It’s not that. It isn’t Jake, really. It’s not that I doubt your...uh...abilities. I just wish you didn’t have to use them. Any of you. And I don’t want to think about her coming anywhere near you.” I shuddered involuntarily.

“Don’t think about it then, Bells. You don’t have to. You’ll be safe, and Charlie will be safe. We wouldn’t let anything happen to you.” I did feel safe, especially now. It was hard not to in my current surroundings. But, again, it wasn’t me I was worried about.

As if I had said the words aloud, Jake responded. “And we will be _fine_. So don’t think about it.” he said confidently, squeezing me to him again. I did feel a little bit better. A little bit. I knew I should really move now. But I didn’t. Instead, I nuzzled my head against his chest again. I really was a mess. He smelled soapier than usual, but still like Jacob. I couldn’t describe it exactly. But it was warm, of course, like everything about Jake, and pleasant to me.

“Oh and, Jake ? I didn’t really think you smelled so bad before. I was just teasing you.” I said earnestly. He chuckled.

“It’s okay, Bella. You were probably right. I’m sure you did everyone a favor.”

“I really was just teasing!” I insisted. He laughed, and it was a welcome sound, even if he was laughing at me. “But, I am glad I made you shower if it helped you sleep at all. I know it wasn’t a very long nap, but you looked pretty serene.” I smiled. “Did you sleep well?”

“I did, actually. But I think that was probably you.”

“My nagging helped you, then?”

“Maybe.” he laughed softly. “I just meant, I think I could sleep a little better knowing where you were. I think.” he continued, slightly hesitant. “You know. Knowing you were safe. And close to me.”

I felt so warm now it spread like liquid through my chest. I just nodded. I told myself I should move again, but I knew it was a useless suggestion at this point. I felt too worried and too soothed to move myself away from this warmth prematurely. I was weak. I sighed. He would have to go soon, anyway. It wouldn’t make a difference now. Resigned to my weakness, for tonight at least, I let my head fall softly back against him.


End file.
